Lil' Kim's Prison Blog!

This caged bird must blog! LOL!

Monday, October 10, 2005

Red Ribbon!

I got second place at the Talent Show! They made me take the swear words out of "Suck My Dick", so I changed the lyrics like this:

To all my flubber rubbin' gettin' money hoes
Used to sellin' clothes
And all my ghetto ladies in the projects
Coming through like bulldozers
No, we ain't sober
Bum ladies know better than to start crap
People love a hard lass
One that get up in a brother's butt quicker than an enema
Make a cat bleed then sprinkle it with vinegar
Kidnap the senator
Make him call his wife and say he never coming home
Kim got him in a zone kissing their kids
Even got some of these straight chicks flipping their lids
What? I'm loving this crap!
Queen Bee!
What lady you know can thug it like this?
Imagine if I was dude and hittin' cats from the back
With no strings attached
Yeah friend, picture that!
I treat y'all people like y'all treat us
No Doubt! Ay yo, yo
Come here so I can bust in ya mouth

(Ay yo, come on here lady)
I don't think I want to
(No, that's not fair)
Who you talking to?
(Why you actin' like a jerk?)
Cause you're acting like a jerk
And if I was dude
I'd tell y'all to suck my beep!

[Repeat 1]

No, no, no, no
All I wanna do is get my kitty fed (Brother!)
Count a million bucks in the back of an armor truck
While I get you G'd up off the T.O.N.Y.
The BX, the chron-chron
And the list goes on and on
(On and on and on)
Like Erykah Badu
Once he drink the Remi down
Ooh I got this flipper now
He asked me did I love him
I said what came to mind like doobies be doing
Yeah baby, I love you long time
Look I ain't tryin' to suck ya
I might not even truck ya
Just lay me on this bed and give me some bread
Got the camcorder layin' in the drawer where he can't see
Can't wait to show my girls he sucked the G off my GED
Been doin' this for years, no need to practice
Take lessons from the Queen and you'll know how to mack this
People know he gave me all his cake
I peeled the Benji's off and threw the singles back in his face

[Repeat 1 (2x)]

[Lil' Kim]
I'mma keep it real
For the dough I might kill
I'm try-na see my face on a hundred dollar bill
Met this dude name Jaleel at this Abdulla fight
He said he'd pay me ten grand just to belly dance
Cum all on his pants
I met him at the studio
He showed up with his homeboy named Julio
I said 'Whoa! Who's the other guy?'
Hope you know you paying extra for this creepy third eye
Something about him, I knew he was a phony
Put the burner in his mouth
'Fool, Give me my money!'
He was just a hockey player frontin' like he knew mad stars
In his homeboy's whips like he got mad cars
People ain't shit but they still can trick
All they can do for me is wipe my spit
I'm jumpin' up and up after I'm done
Thinkin' they gon' get some hugging but they gets none

I'm pretty sure that's why I got second not first. Or maybe it's because they wanted some new material. I don't know. You can please some of the people some of the time, and most of the people most of the time, but most of the time you can't please all the people the rest of the time :-P

I don't know when the next talent show is, but I'll let you know!!!!!!! I'm Lil Kim!


At 12:18 PM, Blogger DREWVUITTON2020 said...




At 12:53 AM, Blogger leopatra said...

hey kim im jus gettn started on this blog thing glad to see ya here,utilyze that tyme to clear yo mind to see the signs of why u were blind to the evil eyes who were in disguise as friends who told lies and traded u for their alibis,fuk them tho cuz the queen still flies ,and tho ur locked down ur fans still rise.........namaste all da way

At 9:00 AM, Blogger BrianPumperFan said...

So whats I hear your really not in jail. I know thats not true, because you are there. But anyway, what is going with Hard Copy to say that your not in jail and you went ahead and paid the money to get out. But it dont make sense. But love you boo, where your ass been anyway, your last log was when. Keep us updated Kim. Holla back!!!!

At 11:16 AM, Blogger BrianPumperFan said...

Yeah kim I know your a busy woman, but holla back at boi, check my blog out too. When ever you get the time.

At 12:11 AM, Blogger CeeCee's Mommy said...

Hey Kim! I just found out tonight that you had a blog. To be honest, I had never heard of a blog before. I'm glad you have a direct connect to your fans and supporters. Also, it seems as if it's helping you express yourself. Kind of like an inter-active journal. The CD is HOTTT!!! I'm listening to it now while I'm writting this. You've created a masterpiece, as usual. Please try to keep your spirits up.. I know it's easier said than done, but you know what, you have proven to the world that you're a viking.. a soldier.. a true cannon. Just like you said.. they done f&*#ed up now.. haven't they ever heard the expression 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'.. Last but not least (well sort of).. You have exposed those clowns that traded on you for the snakes that they are.. now try to put it in God's Hands. I know how strong your faith is and that's why He has blessed you so much.. Try not to worry your pretty little head over those dudes.. You have more class, heart and integrity in your pinkie finger than they do in their whole bodies put together. Besides, you have better things to think about.. like how many times your cd is gonna go platinum :) if you can, please announce when and what channel your reality show is gonna be on... Keep praying.. all you need is the faith of a mustard seed to move mountains.. whenever you feel down, try to open your heart and mind to receive all the love and support we your fans are sending you.... CeeCee's mommy

At 1:23 AM, Blogger Shay said...

Just wanted to let you guys know that this is not the real Lil' Kim. I ran a check on the people this person said was in the talent show with them in prison (Maureen Spangler, Arlisa Scott, and Francine Middlesworth) and there are no such people located at FDC Philadelphia. And one of the blogs says she wrote it at 9:55pm. Prisoners aren't even allowed computer access that late. Sorry.

At 10:01 AM, Blogger Lil' Kim said...

Shay's right. I went to elementary school with an Arlisa Scott. Maureen Spangler is a combination of the first name of my 3rd grade math teacher and the last name of the geek from Ghostbusters. Francine Middlesworth is a combination of Francine and a brand of barbeque potato chips from State College, PA.

Nice sleuthing, Shay!


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